Class Reunion

"It's a peace offering and apology," the man said bashfully.  "I didn't mean to embarrass or upset you at dinner tonight, or afterwards," he apologized.

"Come in, please," Jeff told him.  "I didn't mind what happened tonight.  In fact, I think I needed to know that I was wrong about all of you."

"I told you that there are people who care more about you than you know," Chris reminded him once more.  He suddenly seemed very nervous.  "Well, it's getting late, so I'd better go."

"You don't have to rush off on my account," Jeff protested.  "I usually stay up pretty late, anyway.  I haven't slept well since... well, in a while."  He cleared his throat and then continued.  "So tell me about your life, Chris.  Did you ever marry?  Any kids or grandkids running around out there?"

"There's not much to tell," Chris said, actually sounding embarrassed.  "No, I never married.  I was never told of any children that I might have sired while I was sowing my wild oats, as Dad called it.  I certainly hope that I'm not a grandfather yet.  It was kind of creepy hearing little kids call Blake Grandpa."

"I know what you mean," Jeff agreed.  "It sounds so old.  He's only a month older than me."

"I've got four months on him," Chris said mournfully.

"My god, that means you're already forty," Jeff gasped.  "Maybe you should go.  I wouldn't want to keep you out too late and have you too tired to work tomorrow."

"Bite me," Chris laughed.  "You young punks with no respect for your elders," he mumbled and suddenly straight up in the chair.  "Oh my god, I am old.  I just turned into my father."  They both laughed until they realized that they were not alone.  Colonel was standing at the end of the sofa with his arms folded.

"I thought you were going to tell me goodnight," the boy yawned.

"I'm sorry, I really should be going," Chris said quickly.

"You stay," Colonel ordered.  "I'm going to bed.  Dad, if you're going to be noisy, take him to your room and shut the door."

"Goodnight my little colonel," Jeff said smothering his giggles.

"Goodnight Dad, goodnight Mr. Chris," the boy said with another yawn.

"He's so grownup most of the time, but every once in a while I still see my little boy," Jeff thought aloud.

"He does seem extremely mature for his age, but then you were always very serious," Chris observed.  "He's a doll.  He looks like you at that age."

"I see a lot of his mother in him," Jeff told his guest.

"You're his father; it's natural for you to see her," Chris pointed out.  "Fathers aren't known for being objective where their children are concerned."

"I suppose not," Jeff admitted.  "I think he is the best looking boy in the history of the world, but I was rather plain and nerdy."

"You were not," Chris scolded.  "You were... a very nice looking kid."  Jeff turned to face Chris who was struggling to hide the fact that he was nervous and blushing.

"That little twerp was right," Jeff whispered.  Chris looked like he was about to say something, but Jeff kept talking.  "Why did you bring me a rose tonight instead of a bottle of wine, or a cigar or something?"

"Well, you... you ummm... don't smoke," Chris stammered.  "I didn't know if you drank or not, but I couldn't bring you something you would hate.  I remembered you spending so much time in your grandmother's rose garden, and I used to date a floral designer, so I knew that yellow roses represent peace, forgiveness and friendship."

"How long did you date him?" Jeff asked.

"We only went out a few times," Chris answered.  His eyes widened as he realized that he had been caught.  "Who told you?"

"Nobody told me," Jeff assured him.  "I figured it out.  Jennifer may have dropped a hint, though.  Did you come out at the ten year reunion?"

"Well, not formally to everyone, but word did get around," Chris admitted.  "How did you know that?"

"I didn't," Jeff told him.  "Jennifer let me know that you were chosen as the person most changed."

"I wasn't exactly thrilled by that at first," Chris recalled.  "I thought they were making fun of me.  I also didn't see where I had changed any.  I simply accepted who I had always been."

"But their view of you changed," Jeff pointed out.  "The best scoring football player, on and off the field, turns out to be gay.  That could be a shock to some of your former teammates."

"There was one other change," Chris said quietly.  "I'm not the player off the field that I used to be."

"You're not still the best scoring guy in town?" Jeff asked.  "I find that hard to believe."

"I grew up," Chris shrugged.  "I finally realized how dangerously I was living, just to chase a fantasy."

"You found yourself measuring everyone you met to a standard that they could never hope to meet in order to make it easier to not get attached," Jeff thought aloud.

"Exactly," Chris agreed.  He turned to face Jeff.  "How do you still know exactly how everyone else is feeling?  Everyone always came to you for help with their love life or anything else, and you always knew precisely what to do or say to help them.  I'm surprised you didn't become a therapist."

"Hold on there, they came to you for help too, you know," Jeff pointed out.

"Couples came to me for help getting together physically," Chris replied.  "They came to you to stay together emotionally."

"Yeah, and now I know why none of my advice ever worked on you," Jeff laughed.

"I need to apologize to you for something," Chris said suddenly.  "Something happened in ninth grade...."

"Chris, I...." Jeff began nervously.

"Let me finish, Jeff.  You can throw me out of here afterwards," Chris interrupted him.  "I avoided you for a long time after it happened, and it was wrong of me."

"Why did you do it, though?" Jeff prompted.  "I always thought it was because you knew...."

"I left because I was watching you," Chris confessed.  "When your erection got noticed by the other guys, they started teasing you about Claire.  If they had seen the boner I was getting from seeing yours, well, they would have known about me.  Wait a minute... What were you afraid that I knew?"

"I got my boner from watching you," Jeff admitted with a smile.  Before Chris could respond, he continued.  "I had been waiting since the first day I saw you to get a look at you.  I  had never managed until that day.  I had seen your perfectly chiseled pecs and abs during class.  I even saw that gorgeous butt in the showers.  My timing was always off to see any more without giving myself away.  I was terrified of how you would react if you knew that I was perving on you."

"We were such fools," Chris mused.  "We've lost twenty years."

"You implied that you're single," Jeff observed.  "I do have to tell you something though."
"I wouldn't expect to be your first," Chris said hastily.  "That would be rare at our age."

"It's a little more involved than that," Jeff continued.  "You will be my second.  Kyle was the first, and the reason that I can't take this very fast."

"The Kyle you named your son after?" Chris clarified and Jeff nodded.

"As you know, Kyle and I were roommates in college," Jeff explained.  "We fell in love with each other, but I wasn't ready to face being gay.  You remember my grandmother's church where I grew up.  I married Colonel's mother to try to save my soul."

"Hope went into the hospital a few weeks before Colonel was born," Jeff continued.  "She had a brain tumor.  Surgery to remove it would have saved her life, but it would have cost Colonel's.  Her last conscious decision was to agree with me to save him at the cost of her own life."

"That is incredible," Chris whispered.  There were tears at the corners of his eyes.

"Kyle helped me get through that turmoil.  It was during that time that we admitted our feelings for each other," Jeff recalled.  "Kyle had Colonel and I move in with him as soon as Colonel was released from the hospital.  He supported us while I finished school, then we became partners in business as well as at home."

"What happened to him?" Chris asked tenderly.

"He was diagnosed with a form of bone cancer," Jeff answered.  His voice was shaking with emotion.  "We fought it as long and as hard as we could...."

Chris held Jeff as the sobs took control.  Jeff wept for a few minutes before settling down.  He was silent for another moment, and then finally spoke again.

"He refused to ruin his little colonel's birthday last year," Jeff remembered aloud.  "He was in excruciating pain, but he would not allow himself to die on Colonel's birthday.  He left us the next morning."  Jeff sat up a bit more and added, "As much as Colonel misses his Pop, he started matchmaking the two of us the moment he saw you.  I told him you were as straight as an arrow."

"The only arrow around me is the one Cupid shot me with thirty years ago when I first saw you," Chris assured Jeff.  "I have loved you for so long and now that I know I have a chance, I'll be willing to wait as long as it takes for you to pay proper honor and respect to a truly beautiful man."

"You're pretty special, too," Jeff told him.  "I don't think you'll have to wait for everything, just some things."  He leaned over and kissed Chris softly.  When he broke away, he shivered from head to toe and then laughed softly.

"He kisses me and then he laughs," Chris pouted.  "What's so funny?" he inquired.

"Colonel told me earlier that when he kissed Chris Gerdeman, he felt tingly all over," Jeff explained.  "Then he told me that if I had felt that when I kissed his Pop, he wouldn't want me to never feel it again, and neither would Kyle.

"He's a remarkable boy," Chris observed.  "So, did you tingle just now?"

"I sure did," Jeff smiled dreamily.  "How about you?"

"I haven't stopped," Chris replied, returning the smile.  "I do have to go, though.  There is a full day of work ahead of me tomorrow, and I'm sure you need some rest after your drive today."

"I won't sleep," Jeff mumbled.  "I haven't slept the night through since Kyle died."

"You need more time to grieve," Chris told him.  "Your heart feels empty.  You have to accept your loss."

"No wonder no one ever went to you for advice," Jeff teased. "I accepted the loss before Kyle passed.  My heart was empty for a while, but it's feeling much better now.  I do want more time, but not for my grief.  I am concerned about how Colonel will react.  The reason I can't sleep is that I hate sleeping alone."

"I could have the night crew bring you some extra pillows," Chris suggested.

"I've tried that," Jeff grumbled.  "Pillows go flat and they're cold.  I need a warm body beside me.  Kyle's mother suggested that I share the bed with Colonel, but I don't want any misunderstandings that could land me in jail.  I can wait for you, too."

"You don't have to wait for everything," Chris grinned.  "Come on."  He got up and lead the way to Jeff's bedroom.  "We used to do this on overnight trips with the football team.  You sleep under the covers, and I'll sleep on top of them."  Jeff started to say something, but Chris stopped him.  "We are both too old to believe that we could control ourselves any other way.  Besides, I'm used to it; years of practice, you know."

Both men slept fully clothed, but the one thing they forgot confronted them the next morning.  They were awakened by the bedroom door slamming open.  They both sat upright instantly to see Colonel standing at the foot of the bed.

"This isn't what it looks like," Chris blurted.

"It looks like you're in bed with my dad," the boy countered.

"Son, I promise you, nothing happened," Jeff began.  Colonel launched himself into the air and landed between the two men on the bed.

"Well, why not?" the boy demanded.  "I hope I'm not this boring when I get old."  He erupted in giggles as he was attacked by tickling old men on both sides.  "Stop, or I'll pee the bed!" he warned.  His tormentors released him, and Colonel sat up facing them.  "You really mean it?  You didn't do nothing?  Not even kiss?"

"Well, we did kiss," Jeff confessed as Chris blushed.  "We didn't do anything else, though.  We just talked."  He looked his son directly in the eye.  "Would you be alright if we had done something?"

"Does Mr. Chris make you feel tingles?" the boy asked.

"Yes, he does," Jeff affirmed.

"He makes me feel them, too," Chris finally spoke up.

"Then it's ok," Colonel said simply.  "Only...." His voice trailed off.

"You can just call me Chris," the man told him.  "I don't want to replace your Pop, Harley."  The boy relaxed visibly and rolled off the bed, taking the covers with him.

"You guys really are boring," he announced as he took note of the fact that they were fully dressed in the clothes they had worn the night before.  "You can call me Colonel now," he added as he turned and left the room.

"Come back in here a minute," Jeff called out.  "We still need to talk."

"Jeeze, Dad, didn't you do enough last night?" the boy teased.

"Colonel, I know you said you didn't want to make a big deal out of your birthday this year," Jeff began.  "I just wondered if you had changed your mind."

"I don't want a party ever again," Colonel stated firmly.  "Pop wanted to make my party really special for me.  He stayed alive and he was hurting really bad."  Tears were flowing down his little cheeks as he continued.  "I am going to make that party special for him now.  The last birthday party I'll ever have is the one my Poppa gave me."

"I'm sorry Harley, I mean Colonel," Chris said as he wiped his own tears.  "I didn't mean to upset you.  I just wanted to do something special for you because I like you so much."

"I have an idea," Jeff countered.  "Why don't we just invite the Gerdemans to dinner.  No party, just eat together.  Would that be ok, Colonel?"

"No singing, no games, no presents?" Colonel interrogated.  Jeff shook his head to each question.  "It would be just us and Chris' family?"

"That's all," Chris promised.  "I'll have the cook prepare anything you want.  Do you want a cake?"  Colonel shook his head.  "No dessert then."

"Well," the boy said thoughtfully.  "We could have maybe a pie or something," he suggested as innocently as he could manage.  "Do you have lemon pie with that white stuff on it?"

"One lemon meringue pie," Chris agreed with a smile.  "Yes sir, Colonel, sir," he added as he saluted the boy, earning him a giggle from Colonel.  "What else would you like to eat?  The house specialty is fried catfish.  We usually only serve it on Monday nights, but I'll get her to fix some for a small group tonight."

"Could we have corn on the cob and hush puppies?" Colonel asked excitedly.  "I love hush puppies."

"You've got it, little buddy," Chris beamed.

"Thanks Chris," Colonel blurted as he gave the man a tight hug.  He then turned toward the door as he said, "Don't you guys have stuff to do?"  He walked out of the room making kissing noises and giggling.

Chris was looking down at his chest and stomach in wonder.  He ran his hands across where Colonel's head had been only seconds earlier.  He had a dreamy, lost look on his face that Jeff recognized from experience.

"You haven't been around him one full day, and he already has you wrapped around his little finger," Jeff joked.

"I've never felt anything like it," Chris murmured.  "It wasn't a tingle, exactly.  It was more like a warm glow."

"Kyle said the same thing, the first time he held Colonel," Jeff told him.  "So did I.  It never fades, either.  Every hug you get from him will just get better."

"It was wonderful," Chris whispered.  He added with a grin, "What is it about you Beckman men?"

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